Tuesday, October 28, 2003

Hmm I'm quite satisfied now, having written testimonials for four of my friends on friendster =). It's incredibly hard to write testimonials, since I end up using the same adjectives over and over again ad nauseum, so it doesn't really sound sincere. But I am sincere, just that I'm not very good at writing. If anything, I end up using supercallifragilisticexpialidocious to express myself haha. It's so nice to write testimonials, as I just found out. It's like writing in someone's autograph book!

A bit late that I should come to it now, but I had a really busy weekend, that I wanted to comment about yesterday, but ended up watching too much TV to get around to doing.

Friday - Did I mention I had a BMT section outing today? Well, I did. It ranked just about average on my things-to-do-to-enjoy-yourself-on-a-holiday list. The only parts that I felt were enjoyable were the reminiscing about those "good old days" in BMT with all the wacky things that happened and all the memorable moments. Ah, such memories. I didn't quite realise that I had forgotten so much about it until the conversations I had today jogged my memory a bit. Must be a subconscious erasure of unpleasant memories that removed the good ones as well eh?

But most of the time, most of the people there were just talking about their lives in the army (after all, when you're in NS, what life do you seriously have outside of the army?) and I was making myself feel left out, as usual. It's not that I don't like talking about my life in the Provost, which to its credit was a wonderful experience, but I can't help but feel that any tough times I went through (if at all?) in MP must pale into insignificance besides the torture the OCTs go through in OCS. I hardly want to boast about my three months of welfare in the provost, when almost everyone else is commiserating with one another about their painful experiences. So that's the complex I have with going out with these commanders. Sigh. Maybe I've become so convinced of the differences between us and them that I find it impossible to bridge the divide? I must say I was really fortunate to get into the provost - it's seriously the best combat posting you can get, or one of the best.

Thank goodness Guohao didn't manage to successfully invite that person to the gathering. If that person had appeared, I think I might have just turned and stalked away. Hmm, I read this quote on the Internet the other day: "The only one that suffers from your hate is you, the ones you hate don't know it and the others don't care." I should think it's quite true, but I haven't gotten down to analysing why I even bother to put so much effort into hating someone when by rights I shouldn't even be bothered. It's just such a great contrast to my naturally forgiving nature... but then again maybe I'm just forgiving to my friends haha.

Sunday - I watched that new film Identity. Quite intelligent, though by no means a great movie. I must say the beginning of the movie had me expecting quite a lot more than was delivered in the end. The premise given for the not-accidental meeting of 10 strangers at a motel was rather weak, and disappointing. Like reading a thriller and being told at the end that it's a dream or somesuch. That's quite crappy. But the final twist was good. Now I'm waiting for Matrix Reloaded to come out next week...

Mental note to self: Must not go out with ZF so often. Am spending a lot of money on these outings, which is making me feel extremely guilty for my decadent habits. Hmm.

"Yesterday upon the stair,
I met a man who wasn't there.
He wasn't there again today.
I wish that man would go away."
--Hughes Mearns (1875-1965)

Avaris / 10/28/2003 05:55:00 PM

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