Thursday, May 20, 2004

Imitation is the most sincere form of flattery

That has to be the most comforting line to people like me, who thrives on imitation.

Mediquiz today was downright let-your-hair-down fun, as usual. I mean, it is pretty rare to be able to be in the role of something like a teacher and yet not be too serious about maintaining a serious studious image and everything. The session today was truly the wackiest one so far, what with me and R-- (he who allegedly looks a lot like me) imitating the almost inimitable Ms C--, she of the sound that an elastic undergarment band makes when it hits adiposified gluteal flesh, also known as she of the highly-speculated-about-but-cannot-be-confirmed dowdy English name. Apparently, the current batch has it that her name is a most lovable Lucy, while back in my time the rumour was that she was most affirmedly a boop of a Betty. But still, that infamous snapping sound remains tagged to her name. The things that make people live on in history...

Anyway, here is a - to my personal opinion - rather hilarious segment of what happened today. Apologies to those who get no clue.

Me: Okay, one last thing, I forgot. We have to do the alanine cycle.
R--: But you said 'one last thing' five minutes ago.
Me: No seriously, it's the last thing.
R--: Sighs
Me: (goes into Ms C-- mode) Not happy is it erh? Drop Meds lah drop meds lah erh. Cheeky boy erh. Talk so much in class erh. I give you white slip erh.

Other hilarious episodes in past MQ training sessions include:

Me: Come closer! Come closer so I can touch all of you! (Mr L--, he of the high-pitched-cries and the horse-pulling-the-cart and the great nemesis of chalk)
In response to that particular outburst PL said: Can you not say that? It's very disturbing.

Me: Okthat'sallfortodayseeyounextlecture byebye. (Mrs T--, she of the hy-bride orbitals and 'This is Mr Tan. He'snotmyhusband.)

Me: Here, here. (Ms C--, she of the "Before the switch was open, it was closed", otherwise remembered by all she teaches as the teacher with the strange voice, and who I call Snow White's stepmother's reincarnation)

Me: The earth is a spear. (Mr L--, he of the you-do-do-do-do-do-then-you-do-do-do-do-do-then-you-get-the-answer)

Okay, actually quite a lot of those happened today when I was having the most animated conversation with R--. He drove me into fits of laughter with his impersonation of Mrs C--, she of the terribly imperfect English and who reminds me of Alice from the Vicar of Dibley:

R--: So cos plus cos equals two cos cos hor, but don't have to worry hor, because all in the formula booklet hor *chalk breaks*

It brings back tonnes of truly classic memories. If only we had a video of all the tutors in RJ and their little idiosyncracies caught on tape, I would not mind paying lots of money for the endless entertainment. Now that is for someone with a budding mind for business to start pondering about. Or else you can just get R-- on tape, since he does much better impersonations - in my opinion - than anyone I have ever met.

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Watched Troy with Hope, Wee Ming and Emily yesterday. Not bad, considering how much artistic liberty they took with the Iliad to fit it into a 180-minute movie. Orlando Bloom was gorgeous, as always. And the war scenes just looked like someone dropped a pile of satay sticks into a tray of iron filings. Spears are really messy weapons, to be sure.

Something that interested me, was the background music being played during the sack of Troy. If you have no recollection basically it is this woman moaning wordlessly. What, ever since the mad success of LOTR film-makers think they can get someone to moan - and not even with some pretense at using an exotic foreign language - and pass that off as music? They might as well play the Koran, for all the moaning they want.

And how do they get singers - if they can be called singers in the first place and not moaners - to record such tracks anyway? Imagine this: an audition, supposedly looking for an artiste who will be awarded the great (but truly dubious) honour of being part of the soundtrack for Troy. Ms X walks into the audition room, and is given a paper with "Aaaah ahhh ah aaahh aaahaaah aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh aaha aaaaaah aah ah aaaah ahhh" on it. Music director says, "Sing that in your most sorrowful voice, please."

And voila, the place goes to Ms X, who happens to be suffering from the grandmother of hangovers.

Ah, but I complain too much. It was a good movie.

I cannot wait to watch Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. Everytime I watch the trailer and Harry shouts "Expecto Patronum!", a wave of epinephrine just explodes from my suprarenals. I can seriously feel the wavefront of the surge of epinephrine, starting from the middle of my lower back and spreading outwards, contracting arrector pili along the way until it reaches my fingers and toes. An almost unpleasant feeling. Love the trailer, though.

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So it's Diana and Fantasia left to fight it out. I wonder if Fantasia is secretly thanking Jasmine and her lucky stars that La Toya is out so that there is no doubt she will win this competition based on talent and star-quality. In an interesting mirror of last year's finals, this time it comes down to two women, one black and one white, where Fantasia seems to be the hot favourite. All the same, Clay seemed to be the hot favourite last year, so who knows?

Avaris / 5/20/2004 11:30:00 PM

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